Round 1, Day 4: ADF

November 20, 2008 at 3:52 pm 6 comments

I’m posting early today, because I’ve noticed something.

Last night I put myself through hell. I really did.  Not only did I make dinner for my family and then not eat any of it myself, I also got out a loaf of frozen bread dough and left it to rise all day.  Initially, see, my intent was to make chili for dinner, as it was an appropriate meal for the season and one I don’t particularly care for myself.  I figured fresh-baked bread would be a nice compliment to that, since we’re out of cornbread right now.

Problem is, of course, that baking bread smells so darned wonderful.  And Andy called halfway through the day to tell me that he’d had chili for lunch. I switched gears and made sloppy joes instead, as at that point I’d only done preliminary stuff anyway, so this wasn’t a big deal… but sloppy joes smell a lot nicer to me than chili does, so it made life just that much harder.

So anyway…this morning, I get up…and again, I notice I’m not only not desperate to get downstairs and eat, I’m not even desperate to get out of bed.  This morning was really cold here, and my bed was at that perfect state of warmness and cover-weight, and I just wanted to lay there and enjoy it for awhile.  Plus, the fact that I’d gone to bed at 10:00 sharp the night before meant I woke up at 6:00, so the kids were actually still asleep and I COULD sleep in a little if I wanted to.  That was nice.

When I did get down here, of course, I beelined for the bread.  I had one big slice and it tasted like heaven.  Then I had some cereal and my vitamins, and a glass of ice water.

Tonight I had planned a Family Game Night for us.  We do not normally keep snacks in the house, but since we were serving Sloppy Joes last night and planned to sit around playing games tonight — AND, because today is a Feasting Day for me — I suggested that Andy pick up some snacks on the way home last night, which he did.  There are Doritos, Cheese puff, and two boxes of Crunch-and-Munch here, all things that would normally be calling my name relentlessly today.

But I’m not really interested.  And I find that a little odd. I’m sitting here, staring at a bag of Doritos and I don’t WANT any.   How can I possibly not want any?

I think this underscores just how psychological eating is for me.   It’s like I wrote before, when talking about the difference between choosing between two things and choosing to do something or not do it.  My body doesn’t need pizza; in fact, never having been a huge fan of tomato sauce, I wouldn’t normally CHOOSE pizza.  But the choice between greasy, cheesy goodness and a tasteless iceberg lettuce salad with minimal dressing is certainly going to make pizza more appealing than not.   We always want what we cannot, should not, ought not have, so in some ways the mere act of denying ourselves the right to have something at all is enough to make it that much more desirable.

But in this case, it’s not a question of whether or not I can have it, but rather when.  I can eat a whole pizza if I want to, I just have to wait until a non-eating day.  This is, I realize, the rationale behind Weight Watchers’ point system — that you can eat what you want, you just need to budget accordingly.  Problem is, in order to budget accordingly you need to effectively fast every other day, and they don’t really tell you that.  Instead, they focus on eating low-points foods, so in the end you feel you must give up the pizza in favor of the salad so you can ‘save points’.  Ergo: you’re back where you started, dietwise.

Knowing that I could eat this food and not feel guilty, though.. knowing I need not sacrifice here so that I can splurge there — even though that IS what I’m effectively doing — is making splurging a lot less interesting right now.  I guess the difference is that in this case, whether I splurge or not, I still won’t eat tomorrow.  So it’s less a case of splurging, somehow.  I’m not SPENDING something.  I’m just eating…and since I’m not restricted, it’s not really splurging.  It’s just…eating.

This is really interesting.  I hope it continues to be so.  Mom assures me that after the first week, the fasting days get easier.  That’s promising, because even though yesterday was pretty bad, it still wasn’t as bad as I imagined it would be.

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Entry filed under: ADF, Successes.

Round 1, Day 3: ADF Round 1, Day 5: ADF

6 Comments

  • 1. 21daystopangie  |  November 20, 2008 at 7:50 pm

    That’s a good example of why diets don’t work. It seems like this ADF thing is more like an eating habit than a diet which gives it more potential to work I think.

    A lot of people have similar problems with vegetarian and vegan diets. God knows I do. I *CANNOT* have dairy. Well all that does it make me want cheese!!! It helps that I’m allergic at least, but it’s hard sometimes.

  • 2. Jennifer  |  November 20, 2008 at 7:59 pm

    Yeah, exactly.

    I had a few Doritos with lunch, incidentally.

    I feel really full now. o_0

  • 3. Michelle  |  November 21, 2008 at 4:32 am

    For me, dieting is not like that all the time. It’s the difference between a greasy slice of pizza that I have learnerd will make me tired all afternoon but makes me feel good for a few minutes, and a fabulous tuna and white bean salad with vinaigrette and carrots with hummus. If your only choices are iceberg lettuce and pizza, you’ll never last. But that is not all the food that exists.

  • 4. Jennifer  |  November 21, 2008 at 2:24 pm

    Well, being able to tell a difference between the way you feel after eating this as opposed to eating that probably makes that choice easier.

    But I don’t always have the time to throw together a fabulous tuna and white bean salad with vinaigrette and carrots with hummus, much less the money to afford the ingredients that would allow me to make a series of meals along a similar vein. Having six mouths to feed at mealtimes has a negative impact on both endeavors. Since I don’t really notice much of a difference in my energy level or overall well-being when I eat this as opposed to that, the extra cost and effort doesn’t seem worth it right now.

    That, of course, and I absolutely despise tuna. 😉

  • 5. Feaelin  |  December 1, 2008 at 6:25 pm

    Food is extremely psychological. In every direction:
    * A little hungry: I find this gives me just enough ‘edge’ to be really productive, hunger-as-a-goad.
    * Lots hungry: Irritability, unable to think clearly, etc. etc. (fatigue does the same, the combination is downright disasterous!)
    * properly filled (not stuffed): content. 🙂
    * depressed? Well heck, eating fun food is well, fun. Chow up!
    * feeling good, having fun? Bah, we can eat later.

    When dieting (that is, controlling the amount of food I ate), the main result was that since I had to choose between 200 calories of X or Y…had a side-effect of eating healthier foods; “apple? or 12 chips? Bah. Apple.”

    May not be so for everyone.

    Admittedly, I didn’t keep it up. 🙂

    I’ll note that:
    1) Some people are very good at ‘making themselves do things they don’t enjoy’, while…
    2) some people are good at ‘denying things that aren’t good for them’ (activities/foods/etc.).

    Myself, good at #2, bad at #1. So depending on which of those one is good at, I think different techniques will have varying success for you.

  • 6. Feaelin  |  December 1, 2008 at 6:28 pm

    Oh. And Tuna is nearly the only seafood I like.


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